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Unlocking the secrets of the universe


Sometimes I like to think of humanity as being like ants or bees.

You’re probably thinking this is weird but stop and think about it for a second our numbers in our society are vast just like theirs but also more importantly each and every one of us have a purpose within that society.

As kids we’re taught to work together but as we grow up we lose that and are taught often to work alone.

Forget Nobel prizes for individuals, stop feeding the ego of individuals putting them on pedestals above another.

Society either works or fails based entirely on the co-operation of the human race.

So many people out there in the world believe they have the answer to this or know what that means then someone else comes along and laughs at their theories and debunks them.

What if these people actually worked together?

What if all the scientists worked together instead of against one another?

What if all the archaeologists worked together, pulling info and knowledge from across all cultures?

It is my belief that when humanity releases ego and begins to work together. Then, the secrets of the world, and the universe will be unlocked. It is our ego that is holding us back in fear.

Ok lets try this another way.

No one person can do everything and they shouldn’t expect to be. Can you?

Everyone has a purpose, a speciality or skill. School, college, life it all sets us up for knowing who we are in this world.

But we all have this deep down feeling of having a purpose here and unfortunately many of us do not know what that purpose is.

War is a by-product of fear.

One mans beliefs and fears are forced upon another and when they are not accepted, war ensues and consumes.

We have seen it time and time again throughout history, between religions and cultures even individuals.

If we focus on overcoming our fears and shrinking our ego we strive to enter a world without war where working together becomes a greater possibility. And questions about who and what we are as people, on this planet, in this universe and whether we truly are alone out here could actually begin to get answered.

Pay without the Pal – a creators nightmare

I wanted to touch on a subject which is timeless and always popping up amongst my peers specifically writers, crafters, artists, photographers and spiritual /holistic practioners.

Now, those who do these jobs as their daily, wage packet earning jobs have it cut out for them, they have to take both the good with the bad and I commend each and every one of them for living their dream and sometimes having to deal with some really cruel, nasty and shitty people.

In order to do what you do you have to believe in yourself so much more than 100%. And when it comes down to pricing your goods or products in all honesty you have a lot to take into account like incomings and outgoings, bills, rent, food etc. You cannot just slap a price tag on something and be done. You also have to take into account how much time you spent creating this product, maybe there are collaborators to pay or items to rent. You really have to look at all angles when pricing items especially if you don’t have many products or have to purchase more items to create more products later.

On to the tough bit.

There are people out there that will not think your products are worth what you label them to be perhaps they think your painting is only worth £50 instead of £100 or maybe they think you should be giving free readings instead of charging for them.

Lets get something straight shall we, these people clearly do not respect the time and effort you have put into your products and they certainly cannot comprehend that you too, like them, have bills to pay. 

Time and again I hear this story and it is so disheartening to people, to the creators to have their work put down in such a manner. Sure we’re still on hard times, if you cannot afford something then don’t buy it! Save up. Wait for maybe a seasonal discount. Don’t bastardise the value of someones work and livelihood to suit your pocket or guilt. 

Where does guilt come in? Well, spending unavailable cash for starters. But when we move from crafters to say mediums we hit a whole other type of guilt. See with the likes of tarot readers, healers and mediums what you’re paying for is classified as a form of entertainment. You can’t go to an event and ask for a refund because no spirits came through for you, gosh no! When I hear friends saying clients demanded or complained they aught to work for free, I am actually taken aback.

These people have gained skills, taken courses, and worked as hard as anyone else to get to where they are. They have every right to charge for their time, energy, effort etc For some what they do actually takes a physical toll on them and yet they still do it because they are called to by something higher-up, something unexplainable to the non-believers atleast! 

Back centuries ago when trade occurred it went something like Mr A traded some barley to Mr B for Beer it was a straight swap and often items were swapped more valuable than others. Then money came along. Everything had a value.

We all know about haggling and getting the best price but that really doesn’t cut it here. 

If we told you your roast dinner was only worth £1 a head when it cost you £3 and thats not including effort and time spent preparing it not to mention the electricity used and gas used. Then we told you we were only going to pay you £1 per head, I’m pretty sure you’d be one peeved off bunny whose worn out from slaving over a hot stove and hungry yourself with more bunny mouths to feed.

There needs to be an energy exchange of equal value in every transaction. So I feed you in one manner, you have to feed me in return in an equal manner. In many cases this is cash. Sure you might not want to pay cash but maybe you have nothing else to offer the person. Cash is the cleanest energy exchange you can offer someone. What am I saying… cash is dirty, its filthy and the root of all evil. Its also putting a value on something but more importantly it has so many uses within that creators world or life like buying food or paying rent, keeping them in materials, providing them the cash to further their skills.

Without this energy exchange, buyers guilt tends to set in not only that but the person you obtained goods from could be fighting to put food on the table, pay their medical bills or even keep a roof over their head and thats not on them for doing what they do and not ‘living in the real world having a real job’ as some have been known to call it, it is on the buyer who refuses to see and pay the worth of the creator.

Think first. Do you want this item? Do you need this item? Can you afford this item?

Who knows maybe you could be paving the way for the next Anne Stokes or Anne Rice!

Number patterns

Do you ever feel like the universe is trying to tell you something? Do you find yourself bombarded by signs like names and numbers?

I do, all the friggin’ time. It’s not annoying though it just makes me smile. I call them my little H-bombs or Hint-Bombs because they make me sit up and take notice or evaluate where my thoughts were.

Once upon a time my hints were my ex’s names, first, surname, nicknames, city name, family members. All of it!

Someone would say a name and it would stand out like a rose in a thorny brush. 

Nowadays its songs relative to Dad that I hear.

More often than not and more often than any other hint for me are numeric signs or angelic numbers.

My number is 11 and it often shows up with me glancing at the clock exactly at 11 minutes past the hour. This happens several times a day to me! 

We’ve even been driving to town and I’ve glanced out the window to see the house we are passing is #211. It happened today!

For years the number 911 was my number… thinking on it now maybe the universe was trying to warn me about my cheating ex. 

That one still shows up but not as often as it did when I was with him.

Anyway, I tend to get 4:11, 8:11, 15:11, 2:11, 16:11, 17:11, 11:11, 21:11.

More often 211 is becoming my number.

Numbers can be anything from 0-infinity, all you have to do is notice the patterns for me its normally when I am not actually thinking, i’ve allowed my mind to enter somesort of deep state that is still in the concious realm because I am awake, alert and talking. Then I see it and its like waking up. You’re even more alert and taking note of where you are, what you were thinking about etc.

This isn’t something I would say you can make happen, it just does. You’ll see it once. Then twice, ok. Then three times, coincidence maybe. Then it keeps on coming without you thinking about it. Then its so often you start to look up what the numbers mean angelically and in numerology. Remember to look up the individual numbers and then the combined numbers.

Normally it is either you’ve gone off track and need to get back on it; you’re on the right path; or, take notice of your current thoughts. 

I don’t think location is relevant because so far for me it hasn’t been and I’ve had my numbers show up for years now!

Who knows maybe something else is going on when I’m in this state like receiving higher information or something. What I do know is alot of people are seeing numerological patterns appearing in their lives. I’m not the only one whose getting 11 as my number. Perhaps its a global thing…

All I can say is pay attention to the patterns that appear to you, take note of them and where your thoughts are. It is all we can do to understand them. But for the time being I’m going to keep thinking my angels are near and keeping me safe and on the right path because since stepping back on my spiritual path this number has been with me and if anything I’d say it’s increasing the number of times I see it.

Scarred for life…?

I don’t quite mean the obvious scarring that everyone can see.

I’m on about the scarring you don’t or think you don’t see. Or perhaps don’t want to see.

In 2013 I lost my dad to pancreatic cancer, 6 months after being diagnosed he died the day before Fathers Day at 5:25pm.

I can talk about it now but back then it hurt a lot and no one understood or could help no matter how special they are or were. No one can complete that void that has just been blasted into your heart, where every day is a trip down memory lane as your mind scrimps and scrapes its memory banks for something to hold on to. Some way to remember them as they were, before.

4 months later the person who had my heart, the person I loved completely, trusted and thought I’d marry and grow old with betrayed me, shattering my dreams, breaking my heart, mind and soul.

He cheated and left. I was an utter wreck tossed into the gutter. And worse his family who’d promised to treat me as if I were their daughter turned their backs.

I needed help getting over a loss and instead of being welcoming they closed the doors on me.

Because of them I am now scarred for life.

Its not obvious to others but to me.

I have been scarred before but never so terribly that I had a complete break down and it created a physical anomaly like a twitch.

When I notice I have it, I have to make it stop, I hate it because one it happens and never existed before that moment and two because its a reminder of what I loved and trusted that betrayed me in the worst way at the worst possible time.

Next time you notice something about someone, stop and think, what could possibly have caused them to have that twitch or habit… maybe at some point they’ve been broken!

Thankfully now I can add the scar seems to have gone

Unread emails doing your head in?

We’ve all got them, unread emails that stare at us day after day like a wolf hiding at the forest edge watching and waiting.

We subscribe to one more, two more, four more and suddenly we’re out of control recieving hundreds of emails a day and thousands a week.

But how many do you actually read huh?

My own has gotten out of control and I have kept putting it off and putting off hoping it would go away. But it doesn’t. In fact it gets bigger and worse and there are more than you can handle or even read.

I think almost 14,000 emails is a bit much and just like clutter in life, email clutter can play on your mind too!

So you make that decision. Its culling time!

You unsubscribe from them one by one but for every one you clear another 20 have arrived.

How on earth are you going to make sense of it.

HAHA… this is where my idea comes in.

I lovingly titled, The Rinse and Repeat Method!

1. Create a label – I called mine Alpha – To be read, that way it appeared at the top of my labels list and was easy to access.

2. On page one visually scan the emails and move to this folder anything important or you do honestly wish to read.

3. Scan again. (repeat if neccessary)

4. Click select all then click delete (and rinse lol)

This will delete all the emails about 50 at a time that you do not need or want.

And you can clear a good few hundred every few minutes, if you’re good and know who they are from.

5. Then once clear and under control again you can start watching what comes in and unsubscribe from those you wish as you go or move those to a folder / label.

Lets get our emails back under control


Don’t label me, ok!

Who are you?

What are you?

Where are you?

When are you?

How are you?

Why are you?

Everyones got questions of some kind for us and each little harmless question puts us into a group separating us from one another. Sometimes this can be dangerous because some people don’t like being labelled as one thing or another.

Other people love labels feeling safe that certain people aren’t in the same category as them. This fuels wars.

I have news for these people, if you don’t like something, keep your mouth shut! Think before you speak because we’re all human and nothing can change that. We all share this little blue and green marbled sphere and we don’t know how long for.

Me, I’m a quiet person, an introvert, sometimes too quiet for my own good. I’ve been told I’m more of a listener. My brain works freaking overtime. But I’m still human. I have other attributes. My job in retail however has me extroverting at times, I need to locate that switch!

One thing I hate is labels.

Another is having people assume that because I’m quiet that gives them a Goddess given right to talk over me. My ex used to do this all the time and I hated it. It made me feel small and insignificant. That only his opinion mattered and was the right one no matter what and mine didn’t matter at all.

You are not small!

You are not insignificant!

You have a voice and a brain!

Don’t let people label you!

So look in the mirror and be strong.

Tell yourself your strengths.

List all the reasons you are significant and what your place is in this world.

Be like Kali and stick your tongue out to those nay-sayers, the people who put you down or talk over you.

Do not for anyone hide your awesome light from this world.

You were meant to shine, you are a star and the universe lives inside you!

Soul Survivor

Almost an hour ago I was sat here in the living room beside my pic of dad in complete and utter silence when my Inner Mean Girl decides to have a full on bitch fight with my inner nice girl.

It has a tendency to go a little something like this:


Who the fuck do you think you are!? You’re nothing! A no-one! You’re a complete failure with your head in the clouds. No one listens to you, everyone talks over you. You’ve no friends and no one loves you! Everyone leaves you including your family and fiance. The world would be a better place without you in it!


Hey Sweetie, go fuck yourself! My head might be in the clouds but at least it isn’t up my arse or anyone elses! I am not a failure I’m a perfectionist and anyone leaving, its their choice, I’m no hypocrite!

As for that son of a bitch, dont even go there girl, he wants to be a player treating people like pawns on a chess board he can (they all seem to enjoy it). I am better off without that user/abuser. As for the world being a better place without me, I bring my own uniqueness to the table and no-one and nothing is going to stop me fighting for what I want in life, what I deserve and I am damned sure no matter how much worry, fear etc you put on me, I will keep trying!

It is so easy to get pulled into that negativity, next time your inner mean girl bitches at you, about you, making you want to cry and curl up in a ball and disappear from the world start mentally shouting at her.

It can take one person 30 seconds to put you down, to make you feel like shit and it can take a lifetime to undo it. Don’t let one prick be the undoing of your soul!

Beating Procrastination

In todays world procrastination is a HUGE issue!

It is so easy after a days work to come home kick off your boots, put your feet up with a cuppa and switch on the box.

Thats the easy thing to do.

The hard thing is to keep plodding along on other jobs or things which need doing.

In this day and age it is so easy to get side tracked, theres so much to distract us, too much even. But do not fret this can be changed.

Here’s a few suggestions for beating procrastination

– Shut yourself away from any and all distractions (tv, kids, pets)

– Unplug your house phone.

– Switch off your mobile.

– Edit notification settings.

– Unsubscribe from any emails you never read.

– Let the kids have sleep overs at a friends or send them to grans.

– Either switch off your tv or switch to something simpler like catch up or online viewing which cuts out the breaks making shows shorter.

– Get rid of any visible clocks or watches. (I have more on this one at a later date).

– Unplug your doorbell.

– Give people warning when you’ll be unavailable so you don’t get any unexpected callers who’ll know you’ll be home and won’t go away.

– Prep meals early.

– Do shopping online.

– Switch the internet off!

What more things can you add to this list?

Try putting one or more of these into practice and see how much your productivity changes.

Ego – Get comfortable in the uncomfortable

Ego be it yours or someone elses can play a huge part in what you do with your life, where you go and what journey you take, what you allow to effect you and not. We’re always learning and that IS a good thing.

But, no matter what don’t let ego stand in your way. Let it go!

Stand tall. Shine like the star that you are and freaking blind everyone with your light. If someone doesn’t like it or is jealous then tough, they will get over it, move on, and can simply bugger off. If you feel uncomfortable, Good! you’re doing something right. Keep doing it and eventually that uncomfortable feeling will fade.

When you follow your heart felt desires, the thing which calls to your soul, of course your ego is going to try and deter you. Its how you’ve been brought up, what some lessons in life have taught you.

Shut up and follow your dreams. Tell your ego whose boss and affirm your intentions daily until you no longer have to, they just simply happen.

Get comfortable in the uncomfortable!

My Mystery Man

I am gonna take you on a wander into the realm of spooky today. If you need to go ahead and grab a pillow, do so right NOW!

Today, was an ordinary day. Bit cold. Bit cloudy. Little bit wet. The weather Gods clashing over who’ll claim the day as theirs.

I woke at 1:19am for no reason to find both cats in my room. Very unsual since one is a grumpy old man and sleeps either on the kitchen side or in the hall by the radiator. Tonight instead he chose to lay curled into a fluffy ball atop one of my handbags.

Eventually I dozed back off, dreaming of something about a non-existent place in Glastonbury and six pieces of stolen silver.

I woke again around 4:30am to go get ready for work.

Nothing unusual happened at work. Nothing at all.

When I finished work, mum and I went shopping. Yep I traded one shop for another.

So whilst shopping we decided to be nosey at the clothes. I spotted 2 tops in the sale I really liked in my size then 2 more tops further round. I grabbed all four.

If you’re wondering when this is going to get spooky…. its coming up!

So let me state here I have never EVER had a full on corporeal vision.

You’d think being in a world where there’s so many beings talked about it’d happen more often than not. Especially since I surround myself with Esoteric peeps.

But sadly no.

I can definately state that up until about 1pm today I had only EVER heard things or had flashes out the corner of my eye, maybe felt things like an old cat of ours rub against my leg. But never what happened at about 1pm today.

On coming home, as you do you go try on your new clothes, I’m not really a fan of trying things on in a shop.

I pull on the first top, a white piece with something written on it in purple like Live Love Laugh. Two types of material sewn together the front being almost see through but not, and the back like a t-shirt.

I do the woohoo its a size 10 and fits.

Then I start to take the top off.

I have my arms crossed to lift over my head.

And there he is.

I practically jump out of my skin because the only males in this house are animals and this is clearly a male standing beside me a little too close. In fact I did jump slightly backwards and to my left.

In the split second I noticed him I noted hair colour, height and age but by the time I removed the top he’d gone.

I think he was either an angel or guardian or perhaps a passing spirit. Having been in this house almost 12 years we’ve not seen any spirits. We’ve had strange smells that we think relate to dad who passed back in 2013 but this person was not him.

I did not feel anything bad about him. Just the shock of it.

The only thing spiritual/esoteric about my day was the fact I was wearing my lemurian crystal necklace.

I did apologise for maybe scaring him off and tell him it is ok to return if need be or he wants to but I was in shock as I’d never experienced something like this before.

I’m curious as to who he was, my mystery man…

Have you had a similar experience you cannot explain?